Key points

• The Five Key Tools are designed to help parents and carers help their children and teenagers grow a real, personal relationship with God — moving beyond simply knowing things about God (“God-smart”) towards being connected to him (“God-connected”). Key truths underpin the approach:

1. God is already at work in your child or teenager's life. You are not starting from scratch, and it isn't all on your shoulders. God loves your child, wants a relationship with them and is already at work in their life. Your role is to partner with what God is doing.
2. This is designed for ordinary, messy family life. Parenting for faith isn't something that needs to happen when everyone is calm, the house is tidy and you've got plenty of time. God designed it to happen in the middle of ordinary life - the busy, boring, joyful and difficult bits.
3. You're not trying to produce a perfect Christian 18-year-old. Parenting is a lifelong journey. The goal isn't to get your child to a particular point by a particular age, but to walk alongside them as they take their own next steps with God.
4. Every child and family is different. There is no one right way to help your child or teenager grow in their relationship with God. Your child has their own personality, interests, needs and ways of connecting with God. You know your child or teenager best and may also spend the most time with them, so you are in a unique position to work out what might help them take their next step.
5. You are a gift, not a performance. You don't need to be a perfect Christian or a parenting expert. Your child doesn't need you to have everything sorted. They need you to walk alongside them as yourself, in whatever season of faith you're in. That includes if you're new to faith or just exploring it yourself.

Things to think about/chat about

• What particularly stood out to you from this session?
• What would it mean for you to see yourself as partnering with what God is already doing, rather than making your child or teenager's faith happen?
• Who helped you discover God? What ordinary things did they do?
• What might your child or teenager's next step with God be now?

Have a go

You could:

• Notice the ways your child is already learning about God from you, perhaps through the way you pray, talk about God or go to church.
• Read Deuteronomy 6:4–9 and notice how ordinary God's picture of faith being passed on to children is.
• Think about all the other things you naturally help your child learn. From brushing their teeth to handling friendships or learning a hobby. What could parenting for faith look like if it was woven into life in the same way?
• Think about someone who helped you discover God. What ordinary things did they do?
• Ask yourself: What might the next step with God be for my child?

Keep exploring

• These ideas are a starting point, not a checklist. You don't need to try everything. Choose something that feels like it might fit your child, your family and the season you're in and see what happens.
• There is no one right way to parent for faith. You're the expert in your child, and you can experiment, notice what helps and work out their next step with God.